Lost sounds and smells of Kolkata...

Some words have so much power in itself that listening to such words bring tears, memories, longingness and many more subtle emotions even in this 4G era of speed. For me "Kolkata" is one such word. It brings in me protectiveness for this city.. my city, inspite of having so many shortcomings, it inculcates a sense of belonging, a feeling of being grounded to my roots. Many non Kolkatans metro city dwellers might say that its a primitive city but I say it moves in its own space and time zone. But sometimes I feel in order to keep pace with this maddening speed my city is losing some smells and sounds like when I was a kid early morning came with chirpings of sparrows, the tinkling of trams and hootings of rickshaws, the smell of the smoke of "chulhas" at the wee hours of mornings by the tea vendors, evenings came with the sound of counch at every households and the traditional music of Doordarshan. These sounds and smells have subdued by the sounds of video games, pizzas and hundred channels. With heavy heart I realize this generation is too busy to notice those but for me those are nostalgia, my root and my childhood.

Friendship..

Yesterday I was returning home from office with my colleague. We stopped by a Panipuri stall. We were engrossed in our discussion about the day in office, suddenly a small poor boy of approx 10 years came to us and asked to give money so he could have panipuri. He was dirty and scantily dressed. we shooed him away indifferently, he cursed us vehemently and moved on to other people standing there. We felt very angry and irritated by his behaviour. But still patiently waited for our turn in the Panipuri stall. Suddenly I saw that child came running with a 10 rupees note and asked the vendor to give him panipuri. His transformation was astounding. His eyes were shining like diamond, he called one of his friend and invited him to share it with him.He was laughing, dancing and his happiness was so contagious that we started smiling with him. I noticed he gave more share to his friend and himself ate less. 

I could not take my eyes off him. He was no longer a beggar child but a beautiful human being and a wonderful friend. I have seen rich children who got everything they desired, to feel jealous towards their friends for petty issues. But here that deprived child chose to share his happiness and make his friend feel important in his own way. His happiness and generosity was an eye opener to the priviledged class like us..If we all could show this small gestures of friendship and gratitude in our own way, World would indeed have been an wonderful place to live in..

Demonetisation: Mixed feeling of a citizen

Since 8th November 2016, India is experiencing tsunami of events. Being an audience to media's monkey dance to the issue as well as citizens aggression to the mess created due to this sudden decision, compelled me to think hard. I am not an economist to draw out strategic clarifications regarding justification of this project nor supporter of any specific political party. But as a citizen of India, realized that its a rare case when someone Acts..We say, we post in Facebook "mera bharat mahan", "respect to soldiers"etc etc..We question, We promise, We discuss but we never Act. It takes an iron determination for a public figure to ignore the effect of Public Image and ACT. The risk of losing votes is more than a nightmare for a politician. And I respect our PM for that..irrespective of everything he Acted.We are facing immense problem everyday to deal with this mess. Daughter's marriage, pensions, household cash crunch are becoming herculean task to manage.Yes, after working for the whole day we are standing hours near ATM for money to sustain. Yes, we are not able to spend the way we want. We are learning to compromise.  Our media instead of providing solace, they are cashing on the problems and issues to increase TRP. Amidst all, When We hear people are still showing their brave faces and smiling and supporting our PM in this decisions, it feels good. Lets be patient and a bit less self centered for greater good. There might be a chance to contribute in our minutest way to make our country a better place to live in.

KOBE AMI HOLAM TOMAR BUJHINI!!!

Dated 29th January 2016

Kobe ami holam tomar bujhini...
Chander hasi nodir dhare, pagol neshay andhokare
Ekla tomar chokher agoon
dekheo ami dekhini..
Kobe ami holam tomar bujhini.
Gobhir bhabe buker bhetor dhukpukani
Ratri jege chokher joler bandh bhangani
Na lekha sob kobitagulo
Sobi tokhon tomar janno
likheo ami likhini...
Kobe ami holam tomar bujhini.

Aj Bujhechi..Onek Deri
Rakto Jhoray payer beri
shekol chire egiye jaoyar sahosh ami paini
Tumi ki chile ekla boshe?
Opekkhate!!Annimeshe...
Aste ki niye jete, ditam jadi daak?
Uttar gelo haoway mishe
tufan haoway dingi bhashe
Premer kheya doobe gelo..
Bhashate ami parini..
Ami j tomari holam, age keno bujhini...

We shall overcome....someday

When I see around me world seems such a degraded place to live in. Early morning, newspaper speaks only about terrorism, dirty politics, rape. On the way to our office, we see the traffic police taking bribe, trees are cut in order to make broader roads, leud comments passed by hulligans to ladies passing by. At office, colleague cries as her so called boy friend of 10 years left her without giving an explanation. It goes on and on...untill we become machines and shut out our rational thinking and go on doing what we are supposed to do. We are not affected by anything, we just click our tongue and move on....

Are we becoming mentally sick or too selfish and short sighted? Till when can we survive like this? What sort of education we are giving to our children that they commit rape at the age of 15? We are too busy building our career, earning money, maintaining status...

The picture we are painting for our next generation is very grim and I sit back and question myself is this the world I would want my child being born to? Unfortunately, my answer is not very affirmative.

FEEL BLESSED
25TH  November 2015

In the midst of all the hectic routine and cacophony of stress, we forget to listen to the melody of our soul. Going about with our daily chores, fighting through crowded streets to reach office on time, meeting targets and fulfilling expectations of the people around us makes us tired not only physically but we feel as if our emotions are being drained out, relations fading out and one fine day we realize that our soul has lost its lustre...

The thought kept on harping on my mind and meaning of life started getting blurred.One day on my way to office, in the middle of my mental preparation for the upcoming meeting, I saw a girl in rags sitting on the pavement and was trying hard to cover her toddler brother from cold, with the very limited means she had.We see this frequently here but that image was stuck in my mind and I felt blessed for what I have.

I recalled- the nights when my mother checks on me to be assured I was sleeping well, my colleagues takes out their time from their busy schedule just to listen to my rantings about boss and again boost up my confidence to get back to work, my friends go out of their way to solve my problems, my brother who travels half the city just to check I reach home safely, my soul mate cancels his meetings to be there with me when I am low and to reassure "Ami achi to.."

We all have that friend, that colleague, husbands, partners...Small gestures but carry deep impacts which we fail to realize how it silently add glow to our dimming soul.Life cannot always give you big reasons to celebrate, feel blessed for all the small token of love, feel blessed for all the good things and good people in your life because many would die to have what YOU have..

INSECURITY

15^TH JANUARY 2013

New Year is the time to dream, to hope, to cherish, wish all of you a very Happy New Year. Although, the title of the blog is very pessimistic but I wanted to start it in a lighter note. Yes, a brand new year comes with hopes and renewed dreams but this year compelled me to think in an entirely different conduit...Or rather I can say the Delhi issue shook the very base of my human nature. It compelled me to think.. What we are? What we have become? What mental condition makes a human being do such atrocious deeds? Who are to be held responsible? Govt? Politicians? Society?? There's no answer to the questions...and no end to this debate…

After this Delhi incident I am suffering from a different level of insecurity...Some days back I was going back home from office, it was around 9 at night and I had to cross a small lane which was completely deserted. I saw 3 men were standing there and were talking among themselves and the whole area was completely deserted. My heart missed a beat and for no certain reason I started sweating while crossing the lane...flashes of Delhi news kept coming back in my mind and I was petrified...They were decent people and never gave a glance towards me and I reached home safely..But that few minutes of fear made me think that may be this insecurity is growing in every woman’s mind and every man is being looked at suspiciously. There have been massive protests and may be the animals will be punished but what about other Daminis who are getting tortured to death..After Delhi issue and after all these protest, we heard about atleast three more rape cases. So what is the point of all the protests until and unless our mind set changes…We light ten candles and walk miles protesting a rape incident but we keep our calm and silence when we see a woman is being harassed.

This is high time when a massive change in our thinking and in society is needed. The way of upbringing children have to be changed. Our sons should be taught that even if women are wearing nothing that does not give them the license to rape them..Feeling of respect and not dominance towards women to be imbibed. Protest at individual level should be encouraged. We don’t need you to influence too many people to join in the protest, if we just do our part properly, hope a lot will be done. Because yesterday it was a girl in Delhi, today it was a women of 40 years old, Tomorrow it may be anybody among us. So, lets just do our part in our society to reduce the insecurity of women and restore the belief and respect towards men which is being tarnished day by day.

Bisarjan...

        27th October 2012


From the time of my birth Kolkata has been my hometown and I got many opportunities to see it very very closely and know her by heart. Durga Puja in kolkata is always a beautiful experience for the residents as well as tourists...The most beautiful concept that touched my heart was, here Bengalis dont treat Goddesh Durga as someone divine but as a daughter....It is believed that Uma comes every year all the way from Kailash to her Parents place..Dashami is the day when she returns with her children to her in laws place....May be some of my readers may think it as silly but let me tell you..I have seen women crying while they see the idol is being taken for immersion....just like a mother cries when her daughter leaves for her in laws place....This concept had always touched my heart to the core and solidifies my belief that no matter how much we all get modernized and techno oriented, our very base-our culture, love , affection will always be the most needed aspect in our lives...

Amar Shohor..

21st August 2012

Amar  Shohor..

As the days are coming close…my mind and heart are playing games with me…Memories till date are encircling me like dense mist…..I never imagined that leaving home town would be such a Big Deal for me. 

Kolkata…..is not just a city but a huge bundle of memories. I have seen whenever people go outside Kolkata they starts criticizing this city. I don’t understand why they do it at all? Whether to show how happening they are or is there a much deeper feeling? May be they miss the “Tillottama” so much that they use it as a shield to hide or control the homesickness and nostalgia…

As I stand at a juncture of leaving it behind for a fresh start,  I look at my city in a new light and realize how beautiful she is. The smallest of things which we so easily take for granted are the ones which are missed when looked at from distance.

All of us had visited Victoria Memorial as it is one of our heritage building but have you ever seen her as the late evening sun gets ready to set and flashes its light at the summit and the reflection of the building falls on the water body….See her once….I bet you will fall in love with her all over again…Howrah Bridge….We cross it innumerable times while travelling without even glancing at it…at night when the bridge shines in the mauve aura, take a boat ride on Ganga River and watch its tantalizing beauty…. the smell of mud and hay near Kumhartoli, the chanting and narration of Birendra Krishna Bhadra: “ Ashiner sharado prate….” at the dawn of Mahalaya, the slogan…” Asche Bochor abar Hobe” on Dashami, smell of old books at college street are some of the true essence of my city…

But, as I was writing this suddenly a thought crossed my mind that would this city and these memories would have been as tempting and exciting as it is now without the people involved in it? Life and memories are beautiful with the people in it. As spices add tastes to different dishes, different relations as well as different colours in the same relation adds spice in our life…Today I feel special and blessed to have experienced such a colourful life in this colourful city and feel thankful to have some wonderful people in my life who makes this city “City of Joy” in true sense.

5th July 2012

Faith redefined….????????

"Religion"...The word itself is one of the most debated and controversial topic, not only in today's world but since ancient times. And I won’t be getting into the discussion of it with my limited knowledge…But dont you think religion is a relative term which depends on the time and place of your birth? Confused??? I mean to say that I am a Hindu Bengali girl because I was born in Kolkata in a Hindu family, so I belief in Shiv, Vishnu and in other Gods of Hindu Mythology, but what if I was born in Afghanistan?? Won’t I be worshiping Allah??????

Ultimately which matters is faith..Religion may be relative but faith is universal. Its buried deep in our very existence...the faith in a Supreme Being…The fear of accountability to that Power....

Today I was going through the news and came across an interesting piece of news....Scientist had found a new sub atomic particle which is supposed to be the key to understanding why there is diversity and life in the Universe. This piece of news elated me as well as forced me to think theologically...The word God is not just a image whom we fear and worship but a strength…And a part of our existence. Our Parents had taught us that God by his magic wand has created universe and  is constantly looking down at us, rewarding us for our good deeds and punishing for the evil ones. The very sense of accountability towards our creator helps us to become a better human being in this today’s pitiless world.

But after this extraordinary discovery, will God be limited to a mere three lettered word for our next generation or it will enhance the respect for an invisible creator? Well, the answer to this is yet to reveal itself….

3rd July 2012

New Leaf....
Weather outside is pleasant... black clouds are engulfing the sky of the City of  Joy.. cool breeze is blowing, sucking all the heat of all these past months...But I am sweating, nervousness and excitement are taking their turns to influence me...
Writing was my passion since I was in School..but it was always limited to my secret world, no one was allowed to enter it..But after much confrontation with myself I succeeded in creating my own blog...and very happy to write my first post which will always be special to me.......